just completed the msn form thing earlier on, something about personal information and stuffs. 225 characters for each box? my goodness i overshot it by a mile. should probably start eating my words if i continue at this rate. it's weird how people always sound so depressed when they write in their journals. (myself being one of them, come to think of it, i AM depressed) maybe it's this entire setup that makes you feel gloomy and ultimately manipulates your thoughts so they come out as negative cognitions (ok i promise, no more of that coming your way). some theory.

i think the monday blues just brought itself over to wednesday nite blues. the fact that the weather is surprisingly cool tonite doesn't help too. before you think i am some ungrateful nut... i am not! i am oh so thankful that the temperature has finally dropped below 25 sweltering degrees, but... there's just this post-rain kind of silence going around, where you can hear the neighbor's kid trying desperately to tinker one of mozart's sonatas. it is faintly unsettling i tell you. and there goes my mother, with the radio on, listening to another one of those romantic symphonies, and screaming at me to tidy up the room in which i've successfully scattered all my instruments. ahhh where's the equilibrium??? the zen??? the yogic balance?????????? it's no wonder that mental institutions nowadays are choked full of poor unbalanced souls.

oooh there's this faint glimmer somewhere in the far horizon... could it be -> an ufo? hehe fat hope. aww all disappointed now. ok it's gone. zip. nada. finished. kaputt.

on a lighter note, i mite just decide to skip orchestra rehearsal tomorrow. i'm so stressed rite now, and i honestly do NOT feel like looking at my conductor's tomato-face tomorrow. not that she is eternally embarrassed... but that she will probably blow her top when she hears me play... if you can call it playing. i just received the score for goodness sake, and after a day of so-called practising, my verdict is that -> i am not ready in any way. so yeah, i reckon i will skip that practice - mom's backing me up thankfully. UNFORTUNATELY, now i would have to tag along with my mom and brother and one of her extremely rich friends tomorrow to some remote island to the south-east of singapore, for some wholesome pseudo-family activity. she's bringing along her little niece from my school too, how sensationally enticing. really, i sound like an absolute grouch and gringe rite now (hey they all start with a gr how nice) and i probably am. so i think i should just leave this place before it starts to drip with sarcasm and distaste, if it isn't already. have a nice day.