inferiority complex getting you down?

wanna be cookie-cutter perfect?
then invest in a pair of Perfecto (TM) Implants
it comes with a lifetime guarantee (when you die, it expires)
and will not decompose!

i repeat, will not decompose!

so what are you waiting for?
get them today!

Perfecto (TM) Implants are made from only the best silicone - the choice material for teething toys and computer chips! Materials used are all natural, derived from organic sea sand.