wow

i lead a life controlled by the levels of estrogen, with tendencies due to secretions of cortisol, and sleeping habits dictated by melatonin.

my dreams are governed by REM, my fantasies oriented by neurosynaptic transmissions. the food i consume is integrated into my being by enzymes, and my hunger stimulated by the integral activity of insulin and glucagon. heck, the amount i eat is not even within my control, thanks to the all-powerful satiety center.

i am who i am largely because of my frontal lobe, i move because of my precentral gyrus, my speech coordinated by Broca and Wernicke zones, and my world is but a translation of cones and rods, pieces of reflections mirrored by the occipital lobe. what i hear are but vibrations, sweepings of hair, rumblings of membranes.

my inner core is but an atom. which comes and leaves at ease.

~time to eat, end of lesson.

sheesh

teachers who dont turn up at their allocated lesson slots and then take up other subject's lessons and THEN turn up late, really shouldnt spend the following 10 minutes lecturing us on poor turn-out rate.

no lecture notes too, whee,

start your lesson already, damnit.

personality test

if you had only one wish, which would you choose?

1)for anyone you love to love you back

2)all the riches in the world

3)to be able to travel through time

~~~~~~~~

i know my answer, do you know yours?

discomfort

i dont know whats wrong with me, but ive been having indigestion every time i have something at the school cafeteria of late. it doesnt HURT per se, but it just feels annoyingly uncomfortable, like there is something foul in your stomache and you need vaguely to throw up. and the food just WOULDNT GO DOWN. here i am, posting this piece 10 minutes to 9pm, and yet ive been feeling this way since 1pm. and nothing ive eaten so far is helping to relieve this nasty feeling inside. ugh. and when i burp its still the smell of lunch. sigh.

i have always had this problem, but it used to occur only sporadically. however, of late it has been to the extent that WHENEVER i dared to give the student canteen another go (silly me), i'll have the honor of having indigestion settle upon the poor old stomach.

bah. it wouldnt make sense to have to pop an antacid or whatnots every time i eat a meal, would it? gah. so right now im effectively paying for something that would cost me in well-being. great, just great.

i wish i could get my money back for this one.

babies

i rather like the idea of posting up a photo that's related to the entry i am about to write. gives it more dimension, i suppose.

so there i was, last friday, once again in the familiar TSGH, surrounded by neonates. but this time it was different. the patients were chinese and so were the medical staff hovering nervously around.

under the direction of the doctor-in-charge, we carried out a series of psychomotor tests on the two babies who happened to be baking under the heating lamp when we got there. big one baby and thin one baby, prof. rudnicki would have said. i miss him, i really do. while the doctor did a good job listing out the details we should look out for, there was an obvious lack of passion for his job. don't get me wrong, the professional aspect were all on the spot, but i couldnt help but compare how he didnt take care to introduce himself to the patient through the little things, such as warming up the diaphragm of the stethoscope before placing on the baby's chest. and yet it is the small things that make all the difference between impersonal medical treatment and medical CARE.

looking at their wrinkled sleeping faces, i couldnt' help but wonder what sort of person this little child that im examining now would turn out to be. his life is still so clean a slate, with so many opportunities, so many possibilities. but yet, already, some things are already pre-determined, that will separate this big baby from his neighbor at the ward.

how are their families like? are they both well-to-do? any siblings? what lies ahead for these little sleepy-heads? will they breeze through life successful? will they have a good career, with children of their own? or will they grow up to be criminals? murderers? perverts, maybe?

our lives crossed on that friday afternoon, when you sucked on my finger, made my body tingle. you took note of my existence that day, when i caressed your little ovoid belly and heard your heartbeat. but then that is where we say goodbye, for you wont remember me, and i will not recognize you.

still, i wish for you babies all the best. go forth, develop and learn, grow healthy and strong, for the world is your oyster and it's out there waiting.

moping around...

... makes you blind to the little joys of life.

they pop out like the little shoots of spring - easy to miss but still very much there.

if we could just find the time to count our blessings, i think it is right to say that we will find much to smile about, and a very full heart.

=)

always remember how you fell...

...and then avoid the pothole like the plague.

that girl.

on the wrought iron steps she sits,
ethereal green with fuschia nails.

listening quietly to the whispers of the wind
as autumn sheds its leaves.

-reformats brain-

just came off the RIA midterms, and ugh do i need to rinse my brain of the old information in order to absorb new stuff. heh the fate of the girl with little brain.
onwards to pharmacology and infectious diseases!

ooer. nadal!

here's a hot guy - eyecandy for the day!

i especially like this one with his girlfriend. man... such an awesome body and a lovely smile.

midterms

eek.

my brain is stuffed with random, disorganized information regarding autoimmune diseases.

i feel like a bobble head doll right now.

with just one push i will fall headfirst.

i need a break from studying! but that will only result in MORE studying.

aye aye aye.

been there done that

ok now the past is beginning to come back and haunt me.

in the most insidious of ways, through the vilest of mouths and darkest of hearts.

you who hide beneath your veil of innocence, an angel in the day who bathes in waters of lust underneath the cloak of the night.

you who condemn silently inside, and then lower your lids in shame when your name is called on judgement day.

i do not deny, for there is no guilt.

i do not regret for there was no wrong.

yet, do not look upon me with a jaundiced eye, though a pristine bride i may not be,

there lies much more to me than what you see.

in retrospect

i had to smile when i read the contents of the previous post. a knowing squeeze of a smile of one who knows far too well that the wise girl can never be me.

i cannot kiss without love, i cannot listen and not hope to believe, and why does anyone even have to leave? cant we all just get along, forever and ever, until death does us apart?

perhaps that is the song of a very unwise girl, but i think that when love finally finds the way to her, she will be a happier girl than the one who is wise.